FLOAT

The steal grey clouds begin to billow in the darkened navy sky. Fear and mystery dance between the collision of clouds. Total darkness is imminent. It rides the horizon waiting with precision to strike across the wild seas. The tides begin to rise with fury. Sea foam green begins to engulf my swimming body. Life begins to push far away from safety of the shores. My arms begin to paddle as if I had a chance of stopping the storm that was approaching. My fingers begin to tread and worry is stirred with outreached arms pushing waves out of my panicked sight. Uncertainty lingered in the dense air above me and the fury began to overflow in the form of tears. Rain poured from from the dim heavens and the earth called fury into the wild water.

The rolling sea became an abyss muddy colors and lost dreams. Regrets rolled in and doubt touched my face with every spritz of the salty seas. Hope poured from my body along with the heat. My heart was cold, my limbs were blue and aching. Pain spread across my flesh at the realization of the struggle before me. I looked up to see the stars lost in the suffering just as my faith lost in the pain and as the twinkling of the light miles above the earth’s surface faded, my mind soon followed. The waves towered along each side of me engulfing me, reminding me of the impossible fight. There was nothing left of the man that set out to sail so full of life. Vibrancy and courage were once his life vest. What can I do? I am cold, blind, tired and hopeless. I could not win this storm. I could not fight anymore.

I looked up with glassy eyes towards heaven and cried into the salty mist, God help me, for I cannot help myself. Still holding on to the past, like a weight it pulled my weekend body and spirit under the roaring waters. Wings began to whistle and whip. Screeching filled my mind with panic. 3.2.1. I was now looking up through the translucent tides. The world was quiet and the foam on the tip of each wave glistened from below the water’s surface. I knew this was my end. I closed my eyes and Gods promises danced across my weary eyes. I get Go and trusted He would hold on. I began to slowly sink with my arms spread open that in the vision of a cross.
Peace began to circle me like seaweed gently brushing up against my flesh like the merky waters silent tides. As I gasped for one last breath, lips softer than satin pressed against mine breathing life into my very being. Was someone here with me? Then a heavenly voice whispered through the raging waters “FLOAT”.

A chain of regret was unshackled from my leg and a chain of lost dreams was untied from the other. My heavy head fell back and with arms spread wide, I fell into submission of the storm. My feet came out from under me as I lay outstretched just above the ocean floor. Emerald green eyes appeared at the tip of my nose. They sparkled and filled with me light. “FLOAT” I lied there motionless letting the currents move me. I began to see lights far above me. The waters came to color. It felt as id the hands of hope were placed upon my back pushing me higher. I could feel someone was with me. Like strands of silk dancing in the aqua blue, her hair danced around me with the currents.

The light was closer. It was brighter. I wanted to swim to get to beauty sooner. I was anxious and began to move against the tides. Lips pressed to my ear from behind and whispered ”FLOAT”. With hands placed upon my heart, my body fell into ease. The crystal waters were painted with blue and greens. Warmth began to glide over my flesh and bones. The color was returning to my pale flesh. The waters suddenly parted. A warm breeze filled the rescued seas. Her body lied under mine almost as my shadow. Her fingers intertwined with mine she whispered “FLOAT”. Enjoy the beautiful after the storm.” She traveled with me although unseen. The birds glided like angels rejoicing that sun was about to return. It felt as if the sun would rise just for me. She whispered words of encouragement and love as I floated through the storm paths reminents. I was immersed in calm and covered favor.

I felt my heels drag against the coarse sand. Her fingers had slipped from mine. I was alone. “You are never alone” chin and raised itthe heavenly voice spoke. I pressed my palms deep within the sandy soil and came to my knees. An angel with her knees pressed into the sand before me gently cupped my chin and raised it high. “You will never be alone” she spoke from her luminescent emerald eyes and opened them wide to gsee all of, inside of me. The clouds parted and the suns rays danced across her eyes revealing shades of the ocean within them. She was with me all along. Her smile like the pearls of an oyster strung together with exact precision. Her golden locks were like strands of hope falling from heaven graced upon her shoulder like Gods mercy.

One hand I placed upon my ribs and the other drapped across my chest. From my rib an equal he knew had been created and from my chest, my heart beat not for my own survival. Our knees to the ground and there palms pressed into the soil, tears began to fall. The angel slid her hand through the mud…slowly reaching for the gift she had long claimed. She picked her chin up to look ahead at what was before her. She smiled for what felt like the first time. Her hands slid over me and the warmth of her touch caused my body to shake. She than raised her hand from the ground and placed it upon my chin and gently raised it up. She leaned forward and the palm of my hand was placed over her heart so he could feel it beating.

There was no hiding. There was no questioning. Her heart was beating just for her. When I opened my eyes I saw her reflection deep within me. I looked directly into her heart and soul. Her lips floated gently and graced his with a trust and tenderness and passion I didn’t know existed. The mud disappeared, the sun warmed, the laughter healed and the love, oh the love, save the strongest and the weakest. God’s grace was among us.

She placed my hands upon her heart “It beats for you”
She placed my hands upon her lips “They pray for you”
She placed my hands upon her face “My beauty was designed for you”
She placed my hands in hers “FLOAT”

“You once stood at the shore line cursing love and even life. You stood with your feet embedded in the sand, scared to move forward and scared to go back. You lifted your eyes to the heavens and cried out for God in anger and in despair. You felt alone. You felt unheard. You felt unloved and you fell to your knees just as you are now but, you see, I knew the storm would one day come. I knew one day the tide would call you in. So I went in first to test the waters of suffering, to gain strength from the trials and lessons from the pain. It is why you didn’t see me for all these years. I was dusting the oceans bottom clearing rocks from your known path to ensure you were not inflicted beyond repair. I was twirling through the waters to find the spots that would not get any colder than you could bare. I searched the water’s across this world for the heavens above them that would be filled with the most stars so that you could always see a blessing and gaze upon something beautiful. I choose a spot where I could hide in the background and watch you from a distance while you followed your heart that would eventually lead you to me. I saw the moment your heart made the decision to fly. I saw anger rising from the enemy that you would soon prevail. I saw you in trouble, regret and failure had you in their hands. I came to surface and held your hand in prayer as you went under. I was there the moment you submitted into God’s will. I am your angel. Your guiding light, your gentle reminder that even in the storms beauty exists. Among the endless waves and pulling tides, peace is only a surface away. I am your rainbow, a promise that God will not give you more than you can bare, that He will bless you greatly if you simply float throughout the storms. You see my beloved, the storms are placed before you not to drown you. Rather to break you down to a weakness so that you must call on God’s name to be strong. The time spent within the hurricanes is too show you His power but more so His grace. The storms need not to be faught. No need to fight against the tides or tread water. Your God walked on water and parted the seas. You do not need strength or a life preserver, you just need Him. No need to fret or worry, just float. You do not need to see where you are going, even though your heart desires, you just need to believe that God will carry you exactly to where you need to be. Float and the tides from even the darkest storm will bring you home to shore. Just float and the tides will carry you even to that in which you cannot see. Floating has brought you to me. You are home”

As the words left her soul and parted from her lips the sky high above parted. Baby blue and streaks of lavender stretched across the sky. Hughs of pink and gold gathered around the glorious setting sun. The water’s edge returned back into the sea and the dampened sands lie dry and gold like glitter. She stood to her feet with a long ivory gown blowing freely in the soft winds. She extended her hand and lifted me from the sandy soil. I stood before her in awe and in thanks. My mind took time to gather expressions, sounds and smells.

I stood covered in mud and seaweed with dirt under my nails and scars upon my hands. I was torn and needed much repair. How could I stand before such an angel? I was undeserving and ashamed. My head fell for my eyes to stare at the ground while my mind sank into old thought. I shook my head. How could I accept something in which I did not deserve? Tears began to fall.

My angel bent down to the sand and dragged her finger across the crumbled shells. She drew a cross and said “My love, no one is deserving of the love He gives, love is a gift. It is given freely and expecting nothing in return, just as my love for you.”

As my amber ignited eyes rose in amazement, she smiled gently and said “FLOAT with me. You will never be alone.”

Her eyes filled with a million tears that appeared as green crystals scattered across the earths endless journeys that I would one day take with her. She placed her hand upon my shoulders and turned me to look once more at the open sea. She stood beside me as we gazed into the horizon of fuschia and amber and softly said...

“Let it fill you, let it inspire you, let it move you and surely it will also carry you. FLOAT.”